How to Be Strong in Dealing with Family Life. My sister-in-law is unhappy that we don’t talk to her proactively. I don’t find it natural to start conversations with her. My spiritual teacher helped her a lot in the past, but it backfired on her. When I was getting married, she advised me to keep my distance. She is 39, unmarried, and has childhood trauma related to her parents. I want to support her, but I feel drained in the process. She often complains that my husband and I don’t talk to her enough. I can feel her pain, but I don’t know how to support her in a healthy way😥 [conti]

Her psychologist has said that because of her childhood trauma, she is emotionally stuck at the age of 17, even though her actual age is 39. She wants everyone to pamper her like a child, and she avoids taking responsibility for household work, finances, emotions, and her physical health. I get impacted by her harsh words and complaints.

One should not try to help unless one is very clear about what is the real reason of her problem. Whatever be the past issues perhaps she feels lonely and hence wants to talk to someone and share her problems. But no one can be present always. She needs to engage her mind and stay busy in a healthy way. And yes she has to take charge of her life.

So you do not have to feel obligated to do something for her nor feel guilty about not being able to give sufficient time. You can hear her out when she calls but the lesser advice is given the better it is.

Affectionately,

Alok Da

I need to ask you something regarding teaching. There are some students in my class who don’t listen, who are sort of rebels. So whenever you tell them something, either they won’t listen, or they will start arguing. How to tackle these types of students? 📚🌱[…]

September 24, 2026

There are three main reasons for this phenomenon in adolescents.

1. Partly it is the nature of the Age we live in, an Age of exceptional freedom and equality. Hence the old norms and patterns are gone and none of the old methods such as fear, punishment etc work.

2. There is lack of self discipline in the students as well as the teachers. The more a teacher exercises self-mastery the more he or she automatically exercises control over the students.

3. The subject itself may not be interesting or else presented in an interesting way that connects with the students. One should be creative and try to find better ways of engaging them with interesting examples.

Sometimes I find myself in situations where I have done nothing wrong, yet someone falsely blames or slanders me, and even those in authority seem to believe it. Personally, I do not feel the urge to defend or prove myself by explaining, because it seems to me that the person has already decided their position. 🕊️🌸[…]

September 24, 2026

Silence is always better when people try to insult you. Speaking up, retaliating over personal insults drags us down to the level of the person who is insulting. We unwittingly identify with the other person and sully our consciousness. ..

1. As we discussed, I haven’t yet been picked up by the Grace of Mother Mirra in any manner that is transparent to me. I aspire and I pray to the Divine Feminine, the Shakti of the Brahman, as my Mother and ask Her for grace and consecrate what I can to Her. Will this do as an entirely parallel or transient gesture until I have a more specific opening to Mother Mira? 🌸🌱🙏🏻 […]

September 24, 2026

Growing? I would say tremendously given the short period of time. What you describe itself takes long unless one is marked for the true spiritual life and one is reconnecting the ..

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I need to ask you something regarding teaching. There are some students in my class who don’t listen, who are sort of rebels. So whenever you tell them something, either they won’t listen, or they will start arguing. How to tackle these types of students? 📚🌱[…]