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AT THE FEET OF THE MOTHER
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How to deal with the worries and fears about a possible future difficulty, that may or may not come? I think my psychosis is magnifying my worries many times. Sometimes, I am unable to divert my attention from these worries, dear Alok da. I am praying to the Divine, which comforts me sometimes, but not always. I want to remember the Divine most of the time, but with these worries, it feels as if I am living in a mental hell. I want to take Refuge in the Divine, and so, be free of all worries, but I think my psychosis is not allowing me to nestle much in the Divine’s arms. I want to talk and pray to the Divine, both by speaking and writing to Him, but I am unable to come out of these worries, which is making it difficult even to talk to the Divine. I try to reason out the worries by mental analysis, but that is not helping either, perhaps because of my psychosis, dear Alok da. I want to connect to the Divine most of the time, but these worries are very painful😕

Don’t keep thinking of the difficulties and the worries. They only increase by it. As to psychosis take whatever treatment you may have been advised for it. But for the rest look towards the future and feel joy and content in taking Sri Aurobindo and the Mother’s Name. Have faith and endure the passage. Nothing lasts, neither joys not worries and fears. The Divine is the only abiding Truth. Turn your mind again and again towards Him until one day it gets permanently fixed in Him. 

Affectionately,

Alok Da

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