Home » Day to Day Life » I have a habit of saying “No” to everything and everyone, rejecting requests or opportunities at first, regardless of whether they are small request or a big decision. My initial response is almost always a firm “No.” However, after spending a long time in a state of confusion and indecision, I eventually give in and say “Yes.”If I choose not to go ahead with something, I feel like I might have missed out on an important experience or opportunity. On the other hand, if I do proceed with it, I often find myself wondering why I agreed to it in the first place😬.

I have a habit of saying “No” to everything and everyone, rejecting requests or opportunities at first, regardless of whether they are small request or a big decision. My initial response is almost always a firm “No.” However, after spending a long time in a state of confusion and indecision, I eventually give in and say “Yes.”If I choose not to go ahead with something, I feel like I might have missed out on an important experience or opportunity. On the other hand, if I do proceed with it, I often find myself wondering why I agreed to it in the first place😬.

The ability to say No is a power but it also indicates an inability to trust easily. It is almost like seeing the problematic or difficult side of everything. What needs to be done is to step back and stay inwardly quiet and then feel the answer in the depths of your heart. Then go ahead with that decision offering it and the consequences to God. As an interim measure you can always tell the person that you would like to give it a thought and revert in a while. Rushing to say Yes is often worse than rushing to say No. An impulsive Yes is often a rash overconfidence whereas an impulsive No is sign of caution. The mind cannot decide in such a case because it doesn’t have the key to the future. But the heart has an intuitive access to the future and the right thing to do provided you step back and quieten the mind. Try tuning in to the inmost heart and say Yes or No from there.

Affectionately,

Alok Da

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As a psychiatrist, you certainly possess profound insight into psychology. There is a strong reason for saying this: the essays you have written on the Bhagavad Gita transcend the mere label of “spirituality.” Although psychology and the Bhagavad Gita may seem to deal with contrasting subjects, my understanding is that the Gita serves as a treatise on duty—delivered by Sri Krishna to dispel Arjuna’s mental frailty. I would be grateful if you could kindly answer the following question.

July 14, 2026

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It is best to leave the result in the hands of the Divine. Self promotion is a bad policy in the long run. It feeds vanity and arrogance while dropping the actual ability to work well. Work should not be a performance but the joy of expressing one’s inner truth. It should …

I am a woman entering into my 30s. Since a small kid, I remember growing up among mostly male cousins. So much so that I used to be a tomboy. I grew up among female classmates and have had mostly female friendships. 👩🏼❤️‍🔥🌼[…]

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Being a Tomboy or experiencing protective feelings as well as comparisions with other women does not suggest that one is a lesbian or a bisexual. What matters is a clear sexual orientation, of feeling physical attraction towards the same gender. All the rest is a …

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Alok da, I have a question. Earlier, I used to feel that if I had worked on something, I should make sure people knew about it, because the person assigning the work should also know what I contributed in order to evaluate me properly. 💼🧑🏼‍💼❤️‍🔥🌼[…]