Marriages do not work out as we expect them to do because of the gap between the ideal and the strength and sacrifice needed to realise it. This is very much missing today in the fast food and utilitarian culture imported largely from the West. But the Divine is always willing to help us realise the Ideal. He is not the spoilsport to our happiness but the helper and guide and it is only rarely that he does not grant a sincere prayer, and only when He sees the harm that may accrue through it. The reason why relationships end up badly is not God but our incapacity to love. A love full of demands, expectations, wishes and desires based on the need for pleasure or happiness is not so much love but emotional and vital hunger. So too a love calculating gain and loss is a business and a marriage based on social benefits is a transaction. These are as good as failures even if it succeeds by outer standards. So grow in love and try to make it beautiful and sincere. That is all that is needed.
Growing up, I always felt that sex was something that should happen after marriage. But honestly, it was never really about traditional or moral beliefs for me. It was more because I have been doing sadhana of the Mother and Sri Aurobindo, and somewhere within me, I always wondered—why should an emotion like lust or sexual desire come into this? 💞🪷 […]
September 18, 2026
These are three different things that must be seen each in its own right.
Firstly, sex and yoga: as far as most yogas are concerned, including Sri Aurobindo’s Yoga sex is seen as an obstacle. This is not so much because of moral reasons but simply because spiritual life means turning the consciousness and vital energy higher upwards and deeper. Sex, on the other hand pulls it outwards and downwards. This is so because of the pull towards the body. Bodily and vital pleasures are at crossroads with the higher aspiration and spiritual Ananda….
