Charity begins at home as they say. Children imbibe like sponge what they see and experience at home. If they see that boys are being favoured and different yardsticks are being applied to them then obviously they start believing in the myth of being superior. This defect that one often finds in certain Indian homes must be rectified urgently.
Second thing that is important is to develop the gentler, humane, artistic side of nature, to teach them to be more kind and compassionate and caring, happy to serve and do all that is traditionally associated with women. Otherwise boys remain out of sympathy with the feminine nature and one tends to look down upon whatever one does not sympathise with or understands.
Boys need to learn to listen and cultivate the right brain qualities and refine the vital through art, music, poetry just as girls should develop the side of strength through martial arts and activities traditionally associated with men.
Misbehaviors towards women should not be ignored. Boys needs to be explained that women are not pleasure objects regardless of what certain religions and the advertisement industry projects, that all human beings regardless of gender have the Divine Presence within them which gets veiled if we behave rudely or abusively towards anyone.
Finally through stories and inspiring films and characters this respect can be instilled in them. But what works most of course is personal example.
Affectionately,
Alok Da
Follow up question:
The other day my son was playing cricket and the we started talking about Mahabharata so he came to listen, sitting next to me with his bat by his side and we were talking about Draupadi’s disrobing and how bad Duryodhana and Dushashana behaved with her and spoke so ill about here ….My son says as he picks up his bat, “ How dare they, if he said it in front of me I would hit him with this bat black and blue” I was rather proud of him but when my husband found out he told him, “why all this talk with hitting with bat please, don’t talk all this is violence.” Please advise as I felt that is how a man needs to behave if Shakti is insulted…
What your son expressed is not violence but the heroic impulse to destroy evil. It is something beautiful and should be developed and channelised through martial arts etc. Violence is a weak vital’s frustrated and angry reaction. Anger and frustration are surely not good and must be mastered but the impulse to take on evil, punish the evil-doers, to restore the balance of justice are divine qualities and should be nurtured and channelised, not stifled and weakened. Someone who cannot stand up against evil outside will be weak enough and unable to stand against evil within oneself.
Affectionately,
Alok Da
