AT THE FEET OF THE MOTHER
Ask Alok da

Earlier I was in a relationship and had decided to get married but my parents opposed and also I felt it was not based on anything higher and no joy was there being with that person so I left him. Afterwards when I decide to get married I feel guilt and feel that its not something a noble person would do, that it would be better to remain single. Even if I decide to get married I am scared my mind might change later. But I am not able to remain single also. However there is no obstacle when it comes to having a relationship without marriage. But i am not ready for that too. Many times i felt marriage is not meant for me. I think with some kind of support i will be able to live a single life. How to navigate such a situation? How do i bring about a balance? Or should I try to get married😬?

Guilt is out of place here, if it ever has a place. The nobility or ignobility of an action depends upon the motive and not the action itself. As i see it your decision to step out of the relationship was based on a rare inner clarity. It is a rare capacity to discern and I hope you will keep it in all future decisions. 

Marriage is certainly not a necessity unless the need to have a child or the sexual urge is too strong in nature. It generally comes with a heavy price. Though there are beautiful moments of togetherness and the joy of happiness shared, the sense of someone being your ‘own’ to mutually take the burden and care of life, it also ties shackles to the expanding soul and often keeps one nailed to earthly needs. Very few marriages lead to a deep spiritual companionship. Hence more and more youngsters today prefer to remain single or ‘in a relationship ‘ rather than the formal institution of marriage. Commune living while staying single balances both these quite well. It keeps the possibility of endless progress open while allows us the support that a group life provides without trapping us in the net off dependency, expectations and a togetherness that is often shut off from the world and therefore selfish and exclusive. 

Affectionately,

Alok Da

Share this…

Related Posts

There are many difficulties in my house. No one is in a position to understand or explain anything. But my problem is that I am in the last year of my MA. Right now, or even for the next few years, I have no desire to get married, but no one seems to understand this. 😣📚🌹👨🏻‍❤️‍👩🏻[…]

A simple thumb rule for our times is that one should not marry until one is psychologically ready and financially independent. One should at least know something about the person and the family before deciding about

Read More >

How to distinguish whether a feeling of presence in the chest is from the Psychic influence or from the Heart Chakra? 🪷🌼❤️‍🔥

The heart Chakra mainly opens the flood gates of emotions. The psychic which is right behind turns these emotions as well as thoughts and will towards the Divine. The chakras are simply vortex of energies that acts like a knot to restrict the universal into a limited individual working. When the heart Chakra opens it merely floods …

Read More >