Alok da , I am always confused and indecisiveš«£.. this led me to always having big dreams and achieving nothing nor effectively studying since I was 12 and I’m close to 30. I give up like anything. Either I don’t like this or that about this job or that job or this exam or that exam or I’m scared of job profile as a girl or it’s in my state and I want to explore and it’s the same in all aspects of my life. And I never give 100% effort. I feel like I will end up a loser if this keeps going and after all this thinking I again end up watching random web series. The only good thing in life is the 10-20 minutes I spend talking to image of Ma and Aurobindo in the book. But by making mistakes which I know are mistakes, Isn’t that just pushing me more into darkness? Am I rushing or hurrying too much? It’s like I’m sinking deeper and deeper into the abyss of old habits and I don’t know where and what to conquer and stick to it. I’ve watched everything all cures but do nothing for long. Then a thought comes why am I worrying about all this when it’s all god’s plan and then again fall into the cycle in a day or two. I don’t understand anything. You’ll guide me and I’ll not even follow that for more than three days. Can I possibly do anything to grow and rise to a balanced living?
I have a simple suggestions for you.
Sit quietly for 10 min everyday and think about the purpose of your life.
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