The sure sign of love is the urge to give oneself to the person we love. It is not want or craving or desire that defines love but the spontaneous urge to give.
But usually this moment and movement does not last long. The barriers of the ego which had parted a little come back and if there is no return then love starts diminishing and calculations set in. And since it is near impossible for human beings to give there is a tendency for love to fate away. Human love invariably carries the badge of this inherent imperfection. Hence it is vain to expect that it will be so forever.
Marraige is anyways different thing. Whether it starts with love or through acquaintance turning into marraige, its bonds are different. They are common interests, mutual ego satisfactions, sharing of ideas, common goals, children etc. All these different aspects of life when shared get intertwined can hold the marraige despite the intensity of love fading away. Provided the ego element is not too strong and rigid or the nature is not prone to too much anger. Most marraige are lost due to intolerance of each other, quarrels over small things and anger issues. If these are present then one has to work upon them consciously.
As to certainty, it doesn’t exist in this world except in one’s relationship with God which, once established, grows with time. All the rest is subject to fading away even though mechanical or social togetherness or practical considerations keeps people together.
Affectionately,
Alok Da
