AT THE FEET OF THE MOTHER
Ask Alok da

Why is it that people who were once so deeply connected can become complete strangers almost overnight, as if all the shared moments meant nothing? How can they move on so quickly and find someone new, while blaming you for the breakup, claiming that your actions or words pushed them away? They justify their cold behaviour by saying that making you suffer will somehow make you stronger. But how can they not see the emotional chaos they leave behind—the emptiness, the loneliness, the struggle with rejection and abandonment? Is it fair to rationalize their actions as a way of helping you grow, while completely ignoring the hurt they’ve caused? [Conti]

How can they so easily forget the loneliness they once felt themselves? How do they not realize the weight of leaving someone to face that darkness alone?

If ending a relationship is sometimes inevitable, then how should we break up with someone? Isn’t there a more considerate way to end things without turning from lovers into strangers overnight?

It is because the relationship was largely in the vital physical domains, or on the surface emotions where things don’t stay for long. It means that regardless of the claims and the words spoken, there never was any depth from the other person. It also shows that in general the person lacks empathy, is rather insensitive and deficient in the energy of Love. He has emotional hunger to which the name of love is given to lure the other who then becomes mainly an emotional food. When the food gets old or cold, the person turns away to another and justifies it by blaming it on the partner. 

Yes there are decent ways of separating. There should be no need of blame or complain but an understanding that things are not working between them and hence disengaging in the deeper emotional parts is best for both. At the same time they can remain best of friends but without any claim or expectation from each other. 

Affectionately,

Alok Da

Share this…

Related Posts

Today I was thinking about donating money to the beggars, and a thought came to me that if a beggar is in good health, why shouldn’t he work for himself and earn his own money? I also believe that it is the evolutionary struggle that will help them to develop, and if I provide any money, it will create a hindrance to the same. 🤔❤️‍🔥💰🌻[…]

You are absolutely right, without a doubt. The Gita even goes on to say that something given without due consideration of Time, place and circumstance simply brings delusion (moha) to the giver and the receiver both. ..

Read More >

One of your answers about Marriage is that it is for going together for Higher Consciousness and for Sadhana. Each one respect each other. After 23 years of marriage, if the husband’s aim is only to lead an ordinary life and, in each step, humiliate and disrespect the wife, then what will the wife do? 😣🧑🏻‍🤝‍👩🏻🌼[…]

It is for this reason that the ego has been given to man, to ensure that the self-development of the individual is not stifled or thwarted by the pressure of the masses. There is a basic self-respect, a dignity of life, that each …

Read More >

Alok da, it’s been like two-three years since I got an introduction to Savitri, and discourses upon it by M P Pandit, yours and others. I intuitively knew – this is a text that I should be carrying like an inner recitation throughout my life from now on, but still I came to postponing and delaying totally getting into it all this time. 😊🙏🏻🌻📖[…]

Reading Savitri everyday is itself a Yoga. If you can do this with quietude and inner concentration, a page a day or more, contemplate upon it or simply let the lines and words reverberate within its sound and words seeping into …

Read More >