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Dr. Alok Pandey
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AT THE FEET OF THE MOTHER
Ask Alok da

Wanted to know how to build a harmonious relationship with parents. This is for me and my wife. We have different value system than our parents. Even different aspirations. But, we are also not detached, very much emotionally attached. We live in different cities, but whenever we visit, it causes a lot of disharmony. There is happiness to meet, spend time, build memories. But, there is an underlying disharmony. They have their strong opinions and they impose that constantly. πŸ˜₯[conti]

Since we visit every 2-3 months, it keeps happening. There is a possibility that we would need to move back to the same city (separate but nearby homes). And we worry that this will take us away from our aspiration.

Cant seem to think of a proactive solution. Also dont feel comfortable not doing anything about this challenge.

Yes it is quite challenging partly due to the generation gap and partly due to a tectonic shift in the social order itself. Trying to explain your viewpoint usually doesn’t help. Best is to avoid discussions or keep them to a minimum. Neither try nor expect them to understand or change. Spend time in some common happy activities such as preparing meals or going out together. Express care and love and respect but draw a line when it comes to living your life in the way you feel is best. That is all one can do. Leave the rest to God’s all-seeing eyes.

Affectionately,

Alok Da

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