Here when I say love I don’t mean an emotional idea of it, but which includes everything that could possibly be offered and united. Also, I feel wholeheartedly drawn to viewing all sorts of things as living things, of wanting to be a true and kind friend to each thing, whether it’s an object, a place, tree, and not just an animal or a person, and also the Truth
Because of self-centeredness, I’m not able to be that person at present, to be true to the above aspirations. Even when I know it’s not the better thing to choose, my mind mostly dwells in itself trying to do everything on its own. Funnily, it puts the heading of ‘Faith, surrender and opening to Grace’, and then goes on to ponder those in order to ensure that they get done. To direct everything towards The Mother, to even sincerely pray, I have to break out of the mental current, and then it sneakily catches me again with another thought or idea I which I accept and it makes me forget to remain open. I only ‘open’ very briefly, I only wait and really mean it when I pray with faith once in a while, a handful of times a day. I will choose to open more and more.
Beautiful state. Pray to the Mother and open to Her more and more. The more you open the more everything will come and develop. Do not worry or analyse too much. The mind does not know but She knows all. Nothing is hidden from the Mother. Trust Her, depend upon Her for everything and all will be well.
Affectionately,
Alok Da
