My sister sided with her husband, and I was taken aback by what was happening, as if it were a bad dream. It took me a while to come to terms with it, as I valued this relationship the most. Now, I don’t feel like having much to do with them, and even if I tried, my sister blames my husband for all that happened and does not take ownership, nor share any responsibility for the behaviour. I am disappointed and keeping my distance.
After many months, I feel my sister is trying to have a normal conversation (not about the incident). Still, I have lost interest and I don’t see this working, unless they are ready to take responsibility and act like mature people. I expected them to sit down and have a conversation (which they flatly refused to have, saying my husband is a crap), rather than defining truth as black and white. How must one approach this? It not only affects me but also two families, which could have beautiful relationship (specially growing kids at both sides). With this bitterness, I am unable to continue in normalcy with them.
Love is the truth we must always hold on to and guard as a real treasure. Bitterness and grudge are reactions of the ego and must never be held on to, especially in close relationships. Raising the conversation again and trying to prove who is right will only complicate things more and create more and more friction. Each one looks at things from their perspective and it is best to leave each one with their own understanding. These differences, faults, momentary insults should not lead to a permanent hardening and building of walls or come between and spoil the sweetness and beauty of love.
Affectionately,
Alok Da
