One has keep a balance between impatiently restlessly wanting the Divine to come and waiting superpatiently doing nothing except aspiring from time to time. There is the middle ground where one aspires for the Divine intensely enough but without impatience. It is the vital that brings impatience. When effort is done by the ego it becomes itself a veil.
The truth is that the Divine Mother is very near, nearer than our very breath. We are unable to feel Her because there hangs between us and Her a veil of ignorance which is constituted of wants, desires, demands, preferences, opinions, attachments. This veil must be first thinned out through the practice of nishkama karma, equanimity, inner detachment, offering of one’s actions to Her. This brings Peace and Quietude and one can then begin to feel the Presence. The final act is love and self giving that completely tears up the veil. But love for the Divine is not an emotional bhakti, – the emotions swell no doubt and tears flow, but primarily, living for the Divine, a giving up of oneself in the service of the Divine, wanting nothing else but the Divine, trying to see the Divine everywhere and in everything. All these things along with a growing inner discernment, sincerity and conscious surrender are part of the effort that feeds the fire of aspiration.
Initially the Presence is felt and veiled in everyone. It is only later as the aspiration and the practice (right attitude, equanimity etc) become steady that one is able to remain in contact with the Divine Presence within. A most important condition is absence of desire and inner peace full of faith and trust in the Grace.
Affectionately,
Alok Da
