AT THE FEET OF THE MOTHER
Ask Alok da

My mother has spinal compression but won’t get operation because of fear. So she is going through ayurvedic treatments. She has been told to not work a lot since she is a homemaker. But there is a lot of work to do at home. But my father thinks that she can shorten the work and finish cooking beforehand and says it’s ‘lack of planning’. I feel really upset about it because being all day at home is so frustrating and you have to listen to more tantrums being physically sick. I don’t know if i should interfere between their fight. 🏡💥🗣️↔️

But I don’t want my father to do so and i feel angry on him sometimes but never said it to him. Should i interfere? Because whenever there’s nothing wrong and father shouts at me my mother defends me.

You should certainly tell your father that you feel disappointed to see him being so insensitive to his wife’s pain. Who else will tell him if not you, not because your mother supports you but because it is the right thing to say and do. If your father listens it will help him grow. If not then you should help your mother physically and support her emotionally. For the rest you can leave them to their equation. Each couple has to ultimately find their own equation which works for them. Others, including children, can sometimes help but only upto a point. Intervention should not turn into a new quarrel. 

Affectionately,

Alok Da

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