The role that Mahadev has slid into, in my heart, I feel I need to question it because I want to make sure that I am not being unintentionally disrespectful or blasphemous by running away with my emotions. I didn’t feel the need to ask anyone’s permission or approval when I started seeing Krishna as my brother. But when I see Mahadev, I see him as a husband. and though it makes me happy, it also makes me question it I am doing something wrong or being disrespectful. As if, I must ask someone’s permission to check it that is allowed or not. I’m not even sure whose permission can be asked in this. I feel that this is why I must understand Mahadev better, know of him more. Maybe it will help me worship him with clarity.
It is not a question of disrespect. It is just that the feelings should be translated into real life. Mata Parvati engaged in severe tapasya for Mahadev. Read about her tapasya and see if you are really ready to walk that path!
Affectionately,
Alok Da
