AT THE FEET OF THE MOTHER
Ask Alok da

I have a boyfriend, but my mom doesn’t like him. Whenever I ask my mom why she doesn’t like him, she says it’s because he doesn’t show her respect. She had certain expectations from him, and he hasn’t met them. When I tell my boyfriend about this, he doesn’t want to listen. He says he can’t change how he feels from within. I feel stuck in between. My mom is telling me to break up with him because she thinks he’s not a good match. I have heavy pressure from both sides. Now, I don’t know what to do? Because of this situation, I can’t focus on my work properly, and I’m also having trouble concentrating on Mother’s book reading and other stuff😭.

Well friendship is one thing and marriage quite another. In friendship it is enough that two people respect and trust each other though even there, a friend naturally extends his affection towards those who are the near and dear one’s of the friend. Inability to do so indicates a limitation of the capacity to love. Still that may not matter much in friendship where expectations are limited or none. But marriage is a lifelong committment where not just two persons but two families come together and share each other’s joy and grief. So it is better to sit and discuss these issues before embarking on a lifelong togetherness. Parents are a sensitive issue in Indian homes especially and at least a general goodwill and basic courtesousness is part of the marriage deal. Else the boat will be rocking on unstable grounds.

Affectionately,

Alok Da 

Share this…

Related Posts

I have been a devotee of Hanumanji from my childhood. Traditionally we believe that Hanumanji still stays in the earth. I am curious that in the present Avatar of the Mother and Sri Aurobindo, what is the role he is playing? Also, have you had any experiences with him? Thank you!

Hanuman ji is a wonderful god who grants bhakti and shakti to those engaged in the sewa of The Lord. That has been my experience with him. 

In the Mahabharata itself there is a story of Hanuman ji teaching a lesson of humility to Bhimsen ji. He also protects the chariot of Arjuna against occult forces. In Kaliyuga he has manifested through some mystics, the most famous instance being of Neemkaroli baba. In the new cycle that has begun now, the old guardians and the…

Read More >

Bhaiya, how did you deal with the whole Rakhi thing when your sister used to send you rakhis? I find this whole thing to be more of a formality: sending the rakhi, then repeatedly asking if I’ve tied it or not, asking for photos, etc. 📿👦🏻🏵️👧🏻[…]

As an adolescent I would react against all these customs and traditions, not because they are wrong but because, they are not needed to express the inner bond of love between a sister and brother.  Later, on taking up the Yoga my attachment with the family of birth…

Read More >