With addition to that study circles, meetings and discussions and every evening I used to go to The Mother’s room of our school and used to talk everything in front of Her, from dumbest to dumbest things otherwise just simply sit in front of Her, but after coming here I am feeling like I am lacking all those things. I had tried for Pondicherry University, but I didn’t get there. I came from the land of Jagannath and couldn’t reach Pondicherry, but got stopped in between.
First I felt sad because here a few know The Mother and Sri Aurobindo, no relics centre, no study circles, but the day when I saw Sri Aurobindo’s picture in the department of psychology, then I was like, no I am not abandoned, They have come with me. It happens like when we taste something really good; then rest eventually becomes tasteless. Here, sometimes I am feeling that intense bhakti, love and sometimes unconscious, just like the graph of sine. I am not desperate for anything, but yes, sometimes I am just getting impatient.
It is perhaps The Mother wants you to discover Her within, in your inmost heart, as well as to discover them everywhere, which is what Jagganath is, the Universal Divine, who is everywhere and in everything. Turn all this outer separation into a means for intensifying the aspiration and growing in faith and sincerity.
Affectionately,
Alok Da

