Now, as my child transitions to university, I am working through the rigorous regulatory process to re-enter medicine. While this return brings significant bureaucratic hurdles and self-doubt, it reflects a deep, enduring commitment to my profession. What does Mother want me to do? What do I learn from all this experience? It would be very helpful if you could give your insight into all this turmoil I’m going through.
The Divine leads and guides but does not push or coerce us to follow the leading or the guidance. There is an internal freedom given to every human being to choose from a number of options. The Divine may suggest, does suggest, but never imposes. He leaves us free to choose from a multitude of suggestions that arise from different layers of the world consciousness and touch different parts of our complex nature. This complexity arises due to the very nature of the long evolutionary journey through which the secret soul in us passes. The animal, the titans, the different human layers, the gods, all exist in us and sometimes not only clamour for attention but engage in a real internal fight. There is, on the one side, a whole past that pulls us back whereas, on the other side, there is the pull towards the future, towards higher possibilities. The ego-self, assisted by the inadequate and misleading counsel of the assembly of desires, impels us towards what we believe will give immediate gratification and material advantages. It is only as the soul in us awakens and grows that there is a gentle push in the direction of what is truly good for us. The soul often chooses hardship if it be needed for our progress, but the ego and desires almost invariably, unless under a Sattwic nature’s influence, choose the pleasant, the comfortable, the easy. This is the real reason for the zigzag journey of human life at a certain point of its evolution. It is caught between what it sees as the good as often opposed to what attracts it as pleasant. It is only when one has made the definitive and decisive choice by the deepest truth, that we begin to consciously align with the Divine Will. Once we start doing that, then, and only then, the Divine takes the reins of our life and drives our chariot through the battle of life. Until then, we choose and learn by consequences. Such is the inevitable law of our inner evolution and it can’t be otherwise.
Affectionately,
Alok Da
