AT THE FEET OF THE MOTHER
Ask Alok da

My daughter, aged 22 years, has anger issues. When she gets angry about anything, she becomes very aggressive and uncontrollable. Can you give me any advice on how to console her and make her calm down? 🌿🕊️

Whatever be the inner or outer reasons for anger, it is best not to get into any argument or discussion with someone who is in an angry mood. It often aggravates and escalates it. On the other hand, if you leave the person undisturbed for a while, the anger tends to come down as it has spiked. Discussions and reasoning out can be later after the energy of anger has been discharged. Later, one can sit together and have an open discussion with her with an effort to try and understand what triggers these states and, if she is open and willing to change, one can then reach out for help.

If she understands that this is a counter-productive behavior in the short term and damaging to her personality in the long run then certain strategies and methods can be adviced such as playing some game, say a racquet sport such as badminton or simply going for running or exercise regularly. This helps release of accumulated energy that often gets released through anger. 

There are other ways of coping with anger issues if she is willing, such as playing calming and soothing music in the environment, shanti mantras, or simply chanting Om. You could also pray for her in whatever form or aspect of the Divine you have faith in that peace may be restored in her heart. Simply invoking Peace in her atmosphere, silently and inwardly when she is in anger is another indirect but powerful way of helping her.

Of course, if there is something deeper and pathological, then it would be helpful to consult someone with whom she can openly discuss her issues as a neutral person. 

Affectionately,

Alok Da

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