Also, even after hearing about the pain and suffering their daughters go through, many parents still advise their daughters to โadjustโ after marriage instead of supporting them.
All Societies are undergoing rapid and remarkable changes since the 1960s due to the action of a New Consciousness. It is shifting from the social mode to the individualistic mode so as to hasten the evolutionary process. That is why the family systems are either breaking down or compelled to readjust to a wider, more flexible system. It is important for a woman to be economically independent so that she is not financially compelled and can make independent decisions.ย
As to parents, they are themselves finding it hard to navigate through the transition. In earlier times, it was believed that having a child, especially a male child and marrying your daughter were an important duties enjoined by Religion. But there is nothing sacrosanct about these things. The Dharma of this Age is for each one to discover their true life as an individual and the true family, the larger unit of collective living. This transition is creating some confusion and disturbance, but sooner or later, the new way is bound to replace the old.ย
Hence, donโt try to convince them. They are the products of their social milieu, as you are of the present times. Instead, search for your truth, your true self, and live and act by it. Marriages, at least in their present form, are soon getting dated, at least in their outer form and structure. Its deeper truth of complementary beings coming together for a higher work remains. But mankind is not yet ready for that. It will manifest when man is ready.ย
Suicide is a different and complex subject. It is generally a sign of inner weakness due to which one is unable to take the challenge of life. If we rise up to the challenge, we evolve. But if we break down, then we simply go down the stairway towards darkness. Nobody else suffers and suffers so much (after death) as the person who commits suicide. What is worse is that we punish no one except ourselves and for something we never committed in the first place. Suicide is not something to be sympathised with, but certainly something that reminds us how weak, fragile, and vulnerable human beings can be. One should instead try to understand why things are the way they, fight against what seems wrong, endure with faith and courage if nothing can be done as things do change with time, find creative ways of dealing with challenges, or else simply turn inwards to discover the deeper truths of the Divine who dwells always within us, who alone truly listens and cares, who never judges or condemns but truly loves and loves unconditionally and forever.ย
Affectionately,
Alok Da
