When a person grows fond of another, either because of long habitual association, such as staying together, or some kind of vital interest, such as feeding each other’s emotional hunger or sharing certain common interests, then it is a bond of attachment. This bond requires some kind of physical proximity or vital interchange over the phone, for instance. Its disadvantage is that it often deflects us from the truth of things by bringing in preferences and biases in our dealings. The vital interchange further keeps us bound to the world of ignorance. A person who is emotionally attached to someone becomes blind to his or her overt or covert influence and colours our perception and dealings with the world. Sometimes the influence may be good, but still it may not be our truth or the path meant for us. Most importantly, it ties us to the joys and sorrows of others, influences our decisions, locks our energies by tying us to the person we are attached to, thus preventing us from taking the straight road towards the Divine or the complete plunge.
It is basically a relationship forged by outer circumstances and satisfaction of vital hungers, which is often confused with love.
Detachment means to disengage from this lower and lesser form of relationships, which leads to pleasure and pain, so that we are free to walk or soar on the spiritual path. Instead of loving people through the ego and for the satisfaction of the lower animal needs and desires, one loves them from the soul and keeps in one’s heart and mind always the greater good of oneself and the other person. Instead of dragging the person into the abyss, one helps them lift upwards by associating with the best and the deepest part rather than pulling each other down and dragging to the lowest.
Affectionately,
Alok Da
